“Dear Anabelle, thank you for an amazing time today. I loved every second of it. As requested, it was deliciously sensual and the journey was definitely exquisitely enjoyable. 

 

There were a couple of firsts for me today. I have never been with someone who has squirted before, and I loved it! Also I have never licked an anal rose before, but judging by your reaction I will certainly be doing that again! As you said, it was sensuous, but also a bit taboo too, so surprisingly exciting! 

 

I really do appreciate how you got me to admit to myself, and to you, that the voice in my head was stifling my enjoyment. Having realised that, I feel certain that that particular ghost has now been exorcised and I can just let myself enjoy sex much, much more. 

 

Your website talks about Kama making people feel like a sex god making love to a sex goddess. I think that is absolutely right. You are a sex goddess and what we did today has made me feel distinctly sex godly! N xxxx”

 

I felt sure this was going to be an amazing Kama session the moment N touched me. His fingers on my naked skin were exquisite – really soft, feather like, gentle yet penetrating – it made me shiver with anticipation. This was a man who knew how to give the delicious pleasure of soft touch. I assumed, given that he’d booked a two hour Kama session, that it was also the sign of a highly confident lover who knew how to play a woman’s body with a beautiful combination of touches, contrasting feathery with sharp, light with intense, soft with pain. My body, which had felt a bit flat 5 minutes earlier when I opened the door, quivered, my cunt throbbed, my nipples hardened.

 

We undressed each other, me squatting in my Louboutins, taking his cock in my mouth, as I slipped off his trousers, socks and pants. Mirroring his touch of me moments before, I kept it light, only flicking my tongue over this frenulum and freshly exposed, glistening glans, allowing only the very tip of his cock to pass between my lips. I would honour his erotic approach to my body with an equally gentle and sensual approach to his.

 

It was a beautiful start to the session and I was feeling very happy that I was going to spend a full two hours with such a sophisticated lover. Lucky me I thought as I invited him to lie face down on the bed to give him the Musubi massage start that he had asked for.

 

It always turns me on to massage a man with my full body. I find ways to feed my nipples into his fingers and grind my cunt into his buttocks so that my energy is truly activated before I roll him over. It activated him too! When he rolled over it was with a magnificent erection. I so wanted to take him in my mouth and deep down my throat, but I held myself back, for a short while anyway, to kiss his mouth and glide my body over his, inviting more of his exquisite touch. 

 

The energy between us was hot at this point. I expected his touch to become more demanding, stronger, insistent, probing. My nipples wanted to be bitten and pinched, my cunt wanted to be fingered and fucked, but his touch didn’t respond to the energy between us, instead he continued to touch my body with the same soft, feathery strokes. 

 

What had felt amazingly erotic when he first arrived and our energies were cool, now felt incongruous and even irritating. I wanted to command him, to tell him plainly what he needed to do to please me, but a voice within me urged caution and gentleness – he was a client after all! His body picked up on my impatient, even critical energy and his cock began to soften underneath me. I was losing him and if I didn’t step very carefully I might not get him back. So continuing to glide my genitals over his, ignoring his softness, I gently asked him who polices his sex life. 

 

“Umm, me and my partner I suppose” he replied, a bit startled.

 

“I meant in your head, who in your head is telling you what you can and can’t do with me right now?” 

 

His eyes caught mine, he held my gaze and he held my body still. “I know exactly who it is – gosh, I hadn’t realised!”

 

“Who?”

 

“A woman, my ex-wife, we parted – not happily – years ago.” 

 

As he spoke, putting into words the truth that his ex-wife had been highly critical of him and rejected him sexually, his cock began to harden underneath me. We weren’t moving at all, just talking, me asking very general, open questions and him talking, probably for the first time, about how his ex-wife had made him feel. His cock grew harder and harder as he spoke his truth. 

 

“You’re quite the psychologist!” he laughed.

 

“I don’t think so – psychologists work with the mind, I work with the body. I’m a body-ologist! My intuition knew there was some kind of pain or shut down in your body. Besides, psychologists can’t use this,” I stroked his very firm erection, “To ascertain if you’re speaking your truth or not!” He laughed and I reached across to get a condom.

 

As we fucked I talked. I used words and our combined sexual energies to rewire beliefs he has carried since the ex-wife. I used the words “amazing” and “incredible” a lot. My cunt joined in. I felt her squeezing around him as she orgasmed, squirting her approval at his deep and powerful penetration. I don’t do this very often because I know the power of sexual energy and I’m mindful that you really need someone’s explicit permission before you go about re-wiring their beliefs. But I took his answers to my questions as permission and I knew that giving him updated and empowering beliefs about his sexuality would be of service to him. 

 

It was my first coach who taught me the formula for a spell (words you say to get a desired outcome):

 

Intent + Energy 

_________________  = Outcome

Time 

 

You take your intent, you add energy and over time you will achieve your outcome. The clearer the intent and/or the greater the energy you put in, the shorter the period of time before you have your outcome.

 

I knew I was spell casting with N. I was using my understanding of energy, carefully choosing my words and mixing them in the original witches’ cauldron – my cunt. The alchemy created by the words and our sexual energy travelled from my cunt into his cock, my mouth into his ears and my heart into his heart. Powerful, magical healing shit! Sometimes I find it hard to believe that I know this stuff and that I am lucky enough to use my knowledge every day to heal different versions of the war in men. 

 

Just as careless men harm women and ruin their sexual pleasure, so careless women harm men. I’ve lost count of the numbers of men who have told me similar stories to the one N told me. Women readers, please take a moment to reflect on how exposing and vulnerable the patriarchal model of sex is for men. With no more training or guidance than us, they are expected to: 

 

1. Charm a woman to bed
2. Pleasure her through talk, caresses, soft lighting and music to remove her clothes
3. Get an erection at the right time (and have a big enough – but not too big – cock)
4. Deal with the condom out of sight
5. Penetrate and fuck her to orgasm before coming himself

 

Get any of this wrong and he risks being shouted at, criticised or worst of all laughed at. Most unforgivable is a woman then spilling the beans to her friends to deepen and widen his humiliation and shame. Through all the steps 1-5 the woman is allowed to be (even expected to be in the patriarchal model) a completely passive, even lifeless receiver of his efforts.

 

So, so many of my clients have encountered women who have deeply hurt them sexually and many of these wounded men are married to the women who hurt them. Beautiful, sensual, sensitive, erotic lovers are reduced to fearful, anxious, apologetic men who struggle to relax and enjoy themselves sexually, with any woman, ever again.

 

Until they find a proper whore.

 

Because yes, the women who do harm include “professionals” – women who take money for sex but aren’t professional by any standard, who lack any training, any intelligence or any empathy and end up hurting their paying clients just as much as girlfriends and wives do.

 

The world needs whores!!

 

Obviously a damaged, shut down, sexually unhappy man is more likely to get sick mentally and physically and more likely to do harm to the people in his life, because hurt people have the habit of hurting others. Conversely, happy, confident, sexually secure men are going to show up for the people in their lives in a far stronger, more loving way. 

 

N went home with a massive smile on his face, Mrs N was going to have a much happier evening without ever knowing how or why. She doesn’t need to know – her husband is more relaxed, more loving, less needy, more secure. Because he found a whore who took the war, that the ex-wife had installed, out of him.

 

With the war removed we had a marvellous time! He pinched my nipples, making me squirt repeatedly, once whilst I was sitting on his face, filling his mouth with my amrita which we then shared in a passionate kiss. I travelled my wet mouth down to his cock, finally taking it deep in my throat as his fingers found my cunt and fucked me hard making me squirt over and over and over again. We fucked again and he felt amazing – filling my cunt with a strong, generous girth. And of course, whilst in the 69 position he tongued my anal rose which felt liberatingly taboo and naughty for him and just delicious for me. 

 

He was a man reborn. In his words a “sex god” who confidently made sweet, sweet music with his goddess. Lying together at the end, sharing experiences and feeling into the afterglow in our bodies we talked about how well Beethoven writes “sex” – the perfect contrast between a gentle quiet note and then the explosion of a crescendo and then back to the still, calm peace of an occasional note. 

 

That’s what sex with N felt like after we exorcised the ex-wife. It’s not that her voice has completely left him forever, it’s that he has a strongly wired counter narrative to choose. He’s now back in control of his sex life which is surely a fundamental human right?