The Silver Fox looked up at me sitting astride him riding his cock and simply said, “You are a gorgeous, gorgeous fuck.” I laughed, bent down so that my lips were teasingly close to his and asked him to repeat what he’d just said. I had heard him well enough, but I was charmed by his choice of words  and I wanted to remember them exactly for my website. 

 

What I didn’t ask was, “Why? What makes you say that? How am I a gorgeous fuck?”

 

I have been told countless times that I am an amazing lover. When you are told something enough times by enough people it becomes part of your identity – your ego self. Now, wherever I go, I carry with me the knowledge that I am an amazing fuck – the English language turning my gift into my identity.

 

The first person I was bold enough to ask  the question, “Why?” was The Lover. Others had told me that sex with me was amazing, but I had always brushed it aside assuming they meant, “Sex is amazing and right now it’s with you, ergo sex with you is amazing.” 

 

My ego wasn’t ready to allow sex to be part of my identity.

 

Until The Lover. He lit an audacious power within me which wanted to receive the feedback, understand it a bit more and then own it. So one day, after he collapsed off me once again exclaiming as he had many times before, “Oh my god that was amazing, I could fuck you all day – you are such an incredible lover!” I replied nosily, “Why? What makes me so good?”

 

The reply changed my life.

 

“You enjoy it. I have never met a woman who enjoys sex as much and with every single part of her body – it is just so rewarding and such fun to fuck you.”

 

I was dumbfounded. 

 

To be “good at sex” all I needed to do was enjoy it?!!

 

But it’s obvious isn’t it? Anyone with any gift, be it singing, dancing, painting, gardening, music making, when they are lost in that gift will be enjoying it. That doesn’t mean every single painting turns out the way you wanted it to and you may criticise the results of your joy, but surely anyone who is lost in expressing their passion is getting pleasure from doing so?

 

Until this conversation with The Lover I don’t think I had owned that sex is my gift. I still struggle to understand that others aren’t as obsessed and passionate about sex 

as I am – because when you find something to be pure delight and joy it is hard to understand that others don’t. It’s how I imagine dancers feel when watching my rhythmless body attempting to move in time to  music – pure bemusement that such lack of co-ordination is possible!

 

So I didn’t ask the Silver Fox, “What makes you say that?” Instead I asked him to repeat the words he used and smiled, my ego flattered and charmed a little bit more. Noticing my smile he added, “I suppose you hear this all the time?” I nodded. I do. 

 

And you know what? It bloody thrills me that so many men, of so many backgrounds and all ages, say the same thing. Partly because my ego enjoys the affirmation, but more because it feels such a big, fat middle finger up to the beauty and sex industries which work so hard to make women feel less than by being real women.

 

For as long as we have had patriarchy, women’s sexual role has been to passively receive whatever a man chooses to give her, her role in sex reduced to arousing his desire by staying young, slim, attractive and not quite available.

 

This combination is played out over and over in our magazines, novels, TV screens and films. The constantly reinforced message to women is that to be desirable, to be a “good fuck”, you have to be young, you have to be slim, you have to be attractive and rather confusingly for women, you have to be not quite available so that he has to chase you and win you. 

 

Under patriarchy, a woman who clearly wants sex is just not as desirable as one that doesn’t clearly want sex. 

 

I’m not going to risk the ire of my lovely clients by being self critical about my body and looks (though varicose veins peeps!!), I am instead going to address the insidious “not quite available” role for women.

 

The requirement for women to signal that they’re “not quite available” ranges from the behavioural – playing a bit hard to get so that men get the thrill of the chase –  to the far more problematic physical – “tight pussy.” One of the most damaging myths around sexuality in the patriarchal world is that a desirable woman, i.e. a “good fuck,” has a “tight pussy”.

 

Let’s examine when women have “tight pussies”.

 

(1) Sexually naive and inexperienced women have “tight pussies” by virtue of their age. It has long been a patriarchal man’s wet dream to plunder young, inexperienced, sexually naive women. I hope that the behaviour of the Epstein class has exposed this fantasy for what it is – a truly grotesque hangover from earlier times when girls as young as 12 or 13 were routinely married to men in their 30s, 40s sometimes even older.

 

(2) Non-aroused women have “tight pussies”. When a vagina does not want sex and is not in the process of pushing out a baby it closes tightly shut. Of course there are men out there who get a thrill from pushing themselves into a tight, unwilling, unaroused vagina. They are called rapists and for good reason the practice is illegal across the world.

 

(3) Women in the throes of orgasm, when their bodies have been made to come again and again and again by a beautiful lover, have “tight pussies”. These cunts grip hard onto anything inside them. The strong vaginal muscles which push babies into the world clench cocks in pulsating pleasure, often pushing inexperienced lovers out of them, such is the power of female orgasm. 

 

Obviously men want to feel orgasmic cunts devouring and gripping their cocks (3) but somehow, over the centuries the deep mutual pleasure enjoyed by powerful cunts and their partner cocks has morphed into a rapist’s grim fantasy (1) and (2). Let me be very, very clear here – IF YOU PUSH YOUR COCK INTO A TIGHT PUSSY SHE WILL NOT ORGASM. 

 

Vaginal orgasm, that incredibly powerful sensation that cocks love above all else occurs when a woman has been lovingly honoured, revered and pleasured by a masterful lover. An orgasmic tight cunt is the reward a few lucky cocks get for not rushing things and taking the time to make her body sing and her cunt open wide before entering her.

 

This is the bit that younger men and anyone who has learnt how to do sex from porn rather than with real women don’t understand. They think pushing into a “tight pussy” is the goal – the gold standard of sex. Wrong. If penetrative sex has a “gold standard” it is the ORGASMIC tight cunt gripping your cock in wave after wave of pleasure in ways that you can never stop thinking about.

 

Orgasmic tight cunts are not tight on entry, they are the very opposite, they are open, greedy, demanding. Labia lips get engorged with blood as female desire increases, they redden as they do so (this is the origin of red lipstick – to suggestively mirror sexually aroused labia). As desire increases very often the g-spot pushes itself forwards, towards the vaginal opening, mine has been known to push herself out completely. 

 

Aroused cunts make their desire and their pleasure very known! 

 

Most strikingly of all an aroused cunt is wide open. When she wants cock, she isn’t interested in playing along with patriarchal stereotypes and playing hard to get, she wants it and she’s not bashful about it! Legs open, lips red, often ejaculate flowing and g-spot protruding – it’s not a delicate sight. 

 

A desirous cunt is as powerful and demanding as an erection and I am bored of women being expected to be demure and pretty in their desire.

 

It’s one of the reasons why I reject the word “pussy” preferring the more powerful word “cunt” when referring to my vagina, vulva and clitoris. My cunt is super powerful. She absolutely loves to be fucked – by fingers, fists, cocks, tongues – she opens and purrs, “Yes, yes, yes, more, more, more!”

 

I am told she is “pretty,” but you know what? I don’t care. Because through her I access feelings in my body that are simply divine. 

 

My charming Silver Fox and I enjoyed 90 minutes of almost solid fucking. He will be 80 next year. I do not know how I lasted so long, let alone him! Yet when our time was up it was one of those sessions that really didn’t want to end. Every part of my body hummed, I had floated through most of the session, his cock had tried every part of me, but we kept returning to penis in vagina coitus. 

 

Every time he slid into me my cunt whispered, “Thank you.” She felt so, so, so alive. And in her aliveness I felt her gripping him in wave after wave of orgasm. He was skilled and only got pushed out by my orgasmic muscles once, thereafter he pushed into them, fucking me harder and deeper, building one orgasm on top of another so that I barely knew I was in the room. 

 

Over and over I felt my cunt tightening around him, squeezing him in a pulsating motion. I have heard of women practicing kegel exercises to give their lovers this experience, I don’t, I allow my lovers to do all the hard work! 

 

If you play my body right she will sing and she will sing hard. Because I am lucky enough to have plentiful lovers, my body gets to sing most days and my cunt will pulsate with pleasure, exercising those muscles, whether I have a cock or fingers in me or not. 

 

Women of the world, the best kegel exercises you can do are in your bedroom with your lover(s)!!

 

Men of the world, learn to make your woman’s body sing. Devote yourself to her pleasure and turn on. Do little things to please her because that will quicken her vaginal pulse before you even touch her. A singing body will open for your cock and when she opens to pull you in she is far more likely to grip you, soon after, in orgasm.

 

For me, the best thing about vaginal orgasms is the feeling I have in my body for hours and hours afterwards. I call it humming. It’s a gentle background feeling, it’s not loud and explosive like the moment of orgasm and I wouldn’t call it turn-on (though I am easily aroused in my post orgasmic state). It’s calmer and more expansive. 

 

Thinking about it, after a highly orgasmic session like today, when my vaginal muscles were squeezing hard over and over and over again, I guess, I’m feeling a deep post workout relaxation?! It’s very delicious.

 

I feel all this, and am told over and over again that I am an amazing fuck, because I have a wide open, greedy cunt. I would not feel any of this pleasure, this aliveness, this vibrancy, this power if I had a “tight pussy.” 

 

My Silver Fox made me laugh when he asked, “Do you ever have days when you just don’t feel like doing this?”

 

He didn’t expect my answer, “Yes, I do. Today I really wasn’t in the mood.” He looked aghast. Maybe a part of him feared I had faked all of that. 

 

Anxious to allay his fears I continued, “When I woke up this morning I wasn’t really feeling it, many mornings I don’t really feel it. But with me, the minute someone touches me in a certain way, or I feel an erection pushing against my thigh, or a kiss is particularly sensual, that’s it. My switch is turned on.”

 

He looked a bit relieved, and started to tweak my nipples again, but I wasn’t finished, “I think men get turned on thinking about sex, I get turned on doing sex” I said as I pulled him into me so that I could feel my muscles gripping his cock as he tweaked my nipples one more time. Bliss. Pure bliss. 

 

The playlist reached the point when I knew the session had come to an end. I knew I should get him to the shower, receive my payment and send him on his way. Some days it’s harder than others to say goodbye. Today it was hard. 

 

We had created a beautiful energy between us. He was unbelievably charming and had arrived with flowers because he’d read in my Tinkerbell blog post that I like flowers. He had made my body sing the most divine tunes and greedily I wanted more.

 

With great discipline I got up from the bed, put on my post-sex green gown and showed him to the bathroom. When he came back I was sitting primly, legs folded, specs on checking my next available dates for him. 

 

He came over and stood right in front of me. His beautiful cock smelt of soap. He was getting hard again. I couldn’t resist – I am a professional not a saint! I leant over my folded legs and took him in my mouth. He tasted so good. Somehow his hands were on my nipples again. 

 

I am a very fair person. I don’t have favourites and work is work. I had to regain my composure and lovingly allow this beautiful man to get dressed and drive home. I decided I would dress him as sexily as I had undressed him less than 2 hours previously. 

 

It was fun! I especially loved pulling his white pants slooowly up his legs as I sucked his cock one last time. The pants got higher and higher, I slowed down a fraction, I wanted the final few inches of thigh to last. When the pants were up over his buttocks, I had no excuse not to say goodbye to the cock that had given me so much pleasure, so I tucked him away and pulled up his trousers.

 

He insisted on counting out the money – just in case. And then I walked him down the stairs, wished him a good drive home, closed the door on his reversing car and returned to lie on my bed to just feel all the feels for a moment.

 

The thing that upsets me the most about the “tight pussy” myth is what it costs women. 

 

How many women don’t experience, even once in their lives, the pleasure and power of a pulsating cunt because they think they need to have a “tight pussy”?

 

How many women think that enjoying multiple lovers would “loosen her,” robbing her of a “tight pussy,” and so deny themselves the very orgasmic experiences that would strengthen her vaginal muscles?

 

How many women have suffered surgery to acquire a pleasing “tight pussy”?

 

How many women have been given the “husband stitch” post labour in an attempt to give her back her “tight pussy” after the stretching of childbirth? (The fact that any doctors do this is dumbfounding – just think about it – how does stitching flesh at the entrance to the vagina tighten the vaginal muscle which tightens naturally on its own?) How does it benefit a husband to have a wife who experiences not pleasure, but pain, on penetration for the rest of her life? The “husband stitch” is medical misogyny which then slaps men in the face!

 

How many women push husbands away post childbirth because they fear that he will be disappointed in her now that she has lost her “tight pussy”?

 

How many women deny themselves the unique and powerful experience of vaginal delivery of her children because she wants to preserve her “tight pussy”?

 

This whore has had three vaginal deliveries. Each one strengthened my vaginal muscles as they learnt what they are for. I do not think the Silver Fox would have had anything like the same experience if I had either not had children or opted for c-sections. 

 

Vaginal muscles can be immensely strong when they are exercised and used. The strength that births babies also grips cocks. This power and strength, activated by beautiful love making and expressed in fearsome orgasm, is the tightness that men deeply yearn for. 

 

The model of sex that obsesses (and jokes about) “tight pussy” in a not quite available, passive woman,  is never going to deliver the desired experience of a pulsating, orgasmic tight cunt. 

 

Orgasmic tight cunts don’t require perfect legs, a flat tummy, pouting lips, eyelash extensions – they need relaxed and pleasured women who are comfortable in their sexual power. 

 

Female egos that are taught that sexual passivity equals safety are threatened when they meet their true power. It is genuinely challenging to accept how powerful we are – this is the true challenge of labour and, I would argue, the true challenge of sex for women. 

 

Raised to believe that we must be sexually passive and have “tight pussies”, we struggle to allow ourselves the openness, the pleasure and the power to experience our orgasmic tight cunts. 

 

Female openness is the equivalent of male erection. Thus “tight pussy” is for women what erectile dysfunction is for men.

 

I keep saying this – men want the incredible experience of his hard cock being gripped hard by an orgasmic tight cunt. So men, over to you! Devote yourselves to healing the egoic wounding in women that your careless jokes and unthinking expectations have created. 

 

Open her “tight pussy” with love, attention, deep honouring, reverent words, kind deeds. Give her what The Lover gave me – permission to enjoy myself. And then enjoy her ravenous, open, orgasmic, powerful cunt gripping your beautiful hard cock.

 

A pleasured woman is more orgasmic.

 

A relaxed woman is more orgasmic.

 

An honoured woman is more orgasmic.

 

A listened to woman is more orgasmic.

 

A woman who knows in every cell of her being that she is deeply loved is more orgasmic.

 

Men, your desires are met when you give your women all of the above and all the time, not just when you fancy a fuck. 

 

Is it hard work? Yes, it is. (Which is one of the reasons my husband is happy to share the load!)

 

And it is the most rewarding hard work on the planet!

 

Enjoy the fruits of your labour.

 

xxA