Why Society Needs Queens in the Bedroom

According to legend Cleopatra required visiting diplomats to give her cunnilingus before she would meet to discuss the business of state with them – a seriously enlightened female way of checking the quality of a statesman’s “silver tongue”! 

 

Cleopatra was queen at a time when priestesses were still practicing sacred sex in the temples. Sex was not a shut away, only-in-the-monogamous-bedroom activity, it was highly revered, priestesses were highly trained and initiated to high levels in the magic of energy transmutation, it is not at all surprising to me that it was openly part of politics (how much better than the toxic, negative role sex plays in modern day politics).

 

If you Google “Cleopatra, Cunnilingus, Diplomacy” (as I’ve just done) you’ll find a whole host of articles trying to claim that, contrary to widespread popular belief, Cleopatra was not promiscuous, sexual or sexy – they rush to defend her honour as a strong, powerful, female ruler and seem aghast at the notion that she was all that AND highly sexual.

 

So entrenched have we become in our uncomfortable relationship with sex that we cannot imagine a sexual woman as anything other than a loser, a harlot or a slut – a fallen woman to be pitied. In patriarchy’s hierarchy of control the very, very, very bottom of the ladder is where the poor desperate prostitute sits. Brought to this low level by either circumstance or her own innate, insatiable sexual appetite she is completely weak and powerless, a vulnerable victim, an object of societal rejection and derision. 

 

This is the fate of all sexual women under patriarchy. 

 

Because of their central role in pagan (pre-patriarchal) worship, sexual women could not be allowed to stay sexual. Sexual women were, and are, a direct threat to patriarchal hierarchy and control which is why every sinew is stretched to keep them in the gutter “where they belong” and, where, stripped of their power, they can be safely exploited. 

 

To consider Cleopatra, a woman who sat at the very top of the pyramid, to be sexually promiscuous and even politically sexual is both confusing and threatening to the patriarchy-conditioned brain. You can literally hear it having a meltdown as it tries to hold on to two totally contradictory notions at the same time.

 

Sexy ladies are great to have a roll in the hay with, but they are, by their sexual nature, not the kind of women you admire, marry or trust with any kind of power. As Elizabeth I demonstrated, under patriarchy, for a woman to be powerful she must deny her sexuality, proclaim herself “a virgin” and demonstrate that her powerful and reasonable mind has complete control over her chaotic and sinful body at all times. 

 

For this reason I love to believe that Cleopatra welcomed visiting dignitaries by opening her legs and lying back on her luxurious cushions. That’s the way I would be a queen! Hold this idea in your mind. I am taking a detour and you will think, “Where on earth is this crazy whore taking me?” but hold tight, it will all make sense in the end.

 

There are a few things that everyone in a society seems to get socialised into – a cultural code if you like. In Britain ours is to queue and to moan. We moan about the weather, we moan about our politicians – of all sides (fair enough, they are all lousy), we moan about our utility bills and the state of our roads whilst also saying, “Musn’t grumble” – you have to laugh. 

 

One of our top peeves is how wasps ruin every summer. I kid you not, every single summer these pesky little flying stingers come out of nowhere to ruin our enjoyment of an ice-cream, a coke on ice, a G&T – how dare they?! We spend precious few of our days off outside in the sun and when we do dare to venture outside they appear to spoil all the fun.

 

I grew up with wasp traps on every garden table – lidded jars with a few pierced holes – big enough for a wasp to crawl through but not big enough for them to fly out to freedom through. The jars contained sweetened water to attract the wasps and part of our patriarchal enculturation was to delight in our power over these little insects as they desperately flew around the jars trying to escape, until, eventually exhausted, they fell into the water and drowned. If you think about it, it was truly macabre. 

 

At worst a wasp stings you and it hurts for a bit, but unless you’re unlucky enough to be allergic to their sting, they don’t cause anything other than a minor irritation. Yet the fuss people will make around them! Wasps are the enemy of the British summer and any method of getting rid of them is deemed completely appropriate and is actively encouraged. 

 

But, did you know that earlier, in late spring and early summer wasps played a crucial and totally non-chemical role in keeping aphids at bay? Gardeners obviously benefit the most from the uncelebrated labours of the worker wasp (and they are then often the loudest complainants in later summer) but if you want to eat food that hasn’t been sprayed to death by harmful pesticides, you too should show some appreciation for the humble wasp. 

 

The worker wasp spends months busily carrying aphids from our plants (where they would otherwise cause mass destruction) back to their queen who consumes huge quantities of these blighters in the production of her eggs. For every aphid she is brought she rewards the worker with a squirt of sweet liquid – wasp amrita! The wasps adore her amrita, so happily busy themselves all summer long carrying her aphids in return for her sweet reward. 

 

In late summer everything changes. Just in time for the hot days of August when the beaches and parks fill up with children on school holidays with their melting ice-creams and cans of coke, the wasp queen dies, exhausted, job done, all her eggs laid. 

 

Without their source of amrita the worker wasps spend the remaining months of their short lives seeking out alternative sources of sweet, sticky liquid: hanging fruit on the trees, ice cream in sticky hands, a fizzing beverage on ice – they’re not fussy, they just want the sweetness they have become addicted to and they are willing to risk their lives to get it. 

 

The busy worker wasp who has devoted his life thus far to his queen and the continuation of his species now becomes the pest from hell. A flying terrorist set upon ruining our summer days. A completely toxic, unbearable insect that we all agree to hate.  Bereft of a queen to provide a purpose, and importantly, a reward in his life, the worker wasp becomes a nuisance. A pest. One to be avoided, batted away and even drowned in a lidded jar with a few holes in the lid.

 

Worker wasps remind me of male sexuality. When it is offered in devotion to its queen it is utterly beautiful. With purpose (to honour and worship) male sexuality gives pleasure beyond compare, but devoid of purpose, when the queen has gone, male sexuality is as annoying and toxic as wasps on a British summer’s day. 

 

In October 2022 a report by Un Women UK found that 97% of women aged between 18 and 24 had been sexually harassed, but that 96% of these women did not report the harassment because it is so prevalent and “normal” (like wasps on a summer’s day) and nothing would change anyway. 

 

Sexual harassment is not the same thing as sexual assault or rape, but obviously they are all part of the same utterly toxic pattern in male behaviour. 97% is virtually every single woman surveyed. It is an appalling statistic that shames our society.  I would argue that few males intend to be toxic pests, just as few wasps intend to ruin your enjoyment of an ice cream in August. 

 

Both are just trying to survive in a world without a queen. 

 

Toxic sexual behaviour is what results from pushing our natural and sacred sexual desires into the shadows. God has tried, for 1000s of years, to persuade us, gently and not so gently, to forgo earthly (aka sexual) pleasures in return for a post physical experience eternity in heaven. Goddess was wiser. She knew that souls incarnate into human form for that human experience. 

 

Goddess observed and understood that to deny any human a full sexual life is to deny this aspect of their soul’s purpose. If the soul didn’t want to experience sex why incarnate as one of the most sexual species on the planet? Oak trees are far more powerful and live for hundreds of years – if you’re not fussed about sex why not be an oak?!

 

Humans are fussed about sex, just like worker wasps are fussed about squirts of sweet, sticky liquid. Denied their birthright, confused about the moral code, repressed for 1000s of years by sex phobic myths and poorly informed by lousy modern sexologists, British males (and I am sure many of their counterparts across the world) have become a toxic menace in women’s lives. 

 

In earlier times, when humans worshipped Goddess, young men learned from their society how to reverently channel their sexual energy to worship and honour the feminine. In modern “Western Civilisation” boys are raised in the dark on all things sexual,  left to their own, now porn fuelled, devices and the results are ghastly for girls and young women. 

 

If your society teaches you through what you see (porn) and what you hear (in Church and other places of worship) that your penis is a weapon of war, can we be surprised that so many of our young men do not understand that their penises, their lingams, are tools of love? That the vagina is not a land to be conquered and broken into but a sacred temple to be loved tenderly, worshipped in whispers and gazed at in awe and wonder? 

 

The words men use when talking about women’s bodies  – amongst themselves and with us – matter. It is treason to talk of the death of a monarch and yet queens are disparaged with alarming regularity. Cleopatra one senses would not have tolerated this total lack of respect. Which is why I am sure the diplomat-cunnilingus legend is based on truth. She was a powerful woman who understood that queens demand respect best with their legs wide open. 

 

When this whore hears about or witnesses men behaving like nuisance wasps I am irritated, angered, and mostly saddened. I want to slap the men and tell them to behave, of course I do! But I also want to extort women to power up. Put on your crowns women and DEMAND sexual respect! Unlike wasps, nuisance men can be trained. 

 

The vast majority of them are desperately craving touch, intimacy, connection, validation, the sense of being valued, being seen, feeling worthy. Yes they want to fuck – they have hormones surging around their bodies that make them think about fucking pretty much non stop – but they want so, so, so much more. 

 

Human sexual energy is our creatrix energy – it literally creates life! When it is channelled and focused it is our greatest source of personal power, enabling us to build lives in which we reclaim our personal sovereignty. 

 

Sovereign beings, empowered to create lives that work for them, are a direct threat to patriarchal powers, they always have been and they always will be. Which is, of course, why our sexuality has been so deeply repressed by patriarchal powers who seek complete control over all humans – both male and female – in order to exploit us. 

 

Cleopatra was born in the year 69 BC (it’s true – I have just looked it up!) She died 30 years before Jesus was born and our current era began. By the time of her birth patriarchy was an established system in much of the world and yet there still remained, most notably in the temples devoted to the Goddess Isis in Egypt, remnants of the Goddess worshipping cultures. 

 

What we find difficult to imagine – 5,000 years deep into patriarchy – is that a powerful alternative version of living existed before (and alongside) the patriarchal model. Homosapiens have walked this earth for 300,000 years, that is 60,000 times the length of patriarchy! Humans have managed relations with each other in a non-patriarchal construct for waaaaay longer than we have been told that sex is “dirty and sinful.”

 

Cleopatra knew that sex was delicious, and more importantly, powerful. 

 

This whore knows that sex is delicious, and more importantly, powerful.

 

My solution to the modern sexual harassment problem in the UK is not more education, laws, judgement or shaming, it is for women to truly take back control of their pleasure, to learn their YES and retrain their men in the art of sacred, sensual sexuality. 

 

Men are ready for this. They are yearning for this. I truly believe and witness on a daily basis how ready men are to worship, honour and adore us, to give us immense pleasure, healing and power through devoted love making with their lingams.

 

Whores can lead the way in this, but you have to understand, we will never be asked to rescue humanity! The powers-that-be want to use our services whilst denying our true power. We know this, and we keep working anyway. 

 

Because we have regained our personal sovereignty. 

We know we are QUEENS.

 

Recommended further reading: 

 

“She Comes First” by Ian Kerner (I’m not a super fan, but this is a solid how-to guide for cunnilingus – if you are a bit unsure of this vital life skill, this would be a good place to start)

 

“The Woman’s Anatomy of Arousal – Secret Maps to Buried Treasure” By Sheri Winston (my number one favourite book on female sexuality – every home should have a copy!)

 

“Vagina” by Naomi Wolf